To all the Shavers I have known

To All The Shavers I Have Known

Y'all know the disclaimers in my “About me” applies to everything I write about here as always.

For as far as I've come with my ADD recovery periodically I'm reminded that I still have room to grow. Shortly before the flue bug gave me a wall-to-wall-counseling-statement as my sergeant like to call them, I stumbled across the subject of this article. At the time I was scouring my apartment for a new tooth brush because I didn't feel like venturing out in -10F temperatures to go buy one. So I was really digging around in seldom used drawers when I came across this. 

Well actually not all that, just the three electric shavers you see. Here's the deal, I'm a closet or I guess formerly closeted gadget geek as you've probably inferred from all my prior articles. Seems like at least once a year, I go through a shaving gear phase. Its always been funny to me as well as something of a mystery as well. You see, I don't have much facial hair, and can barely grow a mustache, let alone a goatee, and long ago gave-up any ideas of a beard. So why on earth would someone like me, by their late 20's have already owned eight electric shavers and seven sets of trimmers (actually eight sets of clippers if you count the set I convinced Dad to buy for the dog) ? Well the trimmers I simply have no answer for, save for the fact that three of them revolve around a recent warranty exchange I got the loosing end on and don't care to discuss in such a public forum.

There are actually several reasons why I've owned so many electric shavers, but for the last six or so years, its been a relatively simple answer that also applies to the far less number of blade razors I've owned. Once a year, I go to buy a set of replacement blades for my most recently acquired shaving device only to find the difference in price between a new set of blades (ridiculously expensive REGARDLESS of the make or manufacturer) and a whole new shaver, is only marginal. Unhappy with this and wanting to stick it to The Man, I always opt to buy a new shaver rationing that their profit margin on a new shaver is much slimmer than their profit margin on replacement blades for the shaver. Seriously, last time around, I went to buy a set of blades for one of the machines, shown in the picture, and it was going to cost me $25 and I only paid $30 for the device AND blades barely a year before !! Think you'll get off easier by using a regular blade razor ? Sorry to burst your bubble but a pack of the good generic disposables is going to run you between $10-$15 and lasts ME barely three months, so you're looking at $40 a year for the razors, and you'll probably want some shaving gel to go with them at about $5-$8 a can. A good friend and I were talking about it the other day and he's of a strong opinion that this type of expense is a big reason why facial hair has come back in style with men in the last few years. I think he's right !!!

Again this is funny if you know me. For one, a quick look at my finances for...Well for my entire adult life... nnoo that's too subjective, lets say if you reviewed my finances since I left home the first time; you'd know that its only been here in the last year I'd ever spent money responsibly. So why would I always be so concerned with it, when it comes to shaving ? Probably its just how I was able to talk myself into buying another electric toy I guess. Even then, that still doesn't really answer the question fully. For all my lack of interest in cleaning, WHY razors ?

Well those who really know me, know that for all my lack of interests in cleaning, I've always been a stickler for personal hygiene. Laundry could build-up for weeks and months, dishes could go unwashed till Rapture comes, but I will and have ALWAYS meticulously attended to matters of personal hygiene. Falling down drunk, I'd still manage to run a tooth brush through my mouth before passing out. So it does make sense to me from that viewpoint. I don't think its a coincidence that my shaver phase always comes during the winter either. The cold, damp weather of Ohio makes my pasty-white skin dry and painful. So using a blade razor is much less desirable at this point in the year, making an electric the best option.

My shaving phase was extended this year because on 1 Jan, I decided to quit outsourcing a haircare chore, that I've always left to professionals in the past. It was quite unplanned but without question will save me a lot of money every year. Wanna hint ?

You got it !! I decided to start cutting my own hair. It wasn't a New Years resolution or anything. On that particular day, I'd been too long overdue for a haircut, could not stand it any longer, and with all barbers closed for the holiday, I was forced to take matters into my own hands. Here was that extra big guide comb for my beard trimmers just tempting me, and I said “To hell with it, I can just shave it all off if I botch it. You only live once”. It was surprisingly easy, and being that I've already paid for the equipment, and have been spending $20-$25 a month on hair cuts, I'll save at least $240 a year by continuing to do so.

Okay, time to get this wrapped-up. One more story, third funniest story involving me and shaving equipment, the other two are still classified top secret to protect the innocent and infamous. Freshman year of college I was walking baa... you know what, I better not post that story. So instead I'll tell about one of the incidents in a chain of events involving the funniest/craziest story that involves me and shaving gear. Once I shaved my eyebrows off, even went so far as to get a straight razor, shaving foam, and do it right. You'd be surprised how many people that will get you noticed by. I'm willing to bet over a dozen people threw their backs out doing a double take as I walked by. But that's only a very small part of the story and wasn't even close to being the craziest or dumbest thing that happened that night so I'm gonna stop there.

This is the RedHeaded Rambler signing off.